That Bitch
by SmilySolly
Summary: Lily was Lily; the beautiful kind girl whose smile was capable of enlightening hopes into others' souls. To cut it short, Lily was a "good girl." But who said good girls don't turn bad? (one shot till now)


**Hey there :D Well, I don't know why and how did I write that one but it sort of popped into my mind. I am not yet sure whether I should complete the story or keep it as a one shot. **

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Lily's head was bent on the desk, the words dancing in front of her eyes in incoherent movements, making them hazy, blurry and intangible. Forcing a deep breath in, she tried to concentrate on the task in hand but for some reason her eyes couldn't stop glancing every few seconds at the bouquet of flowers resting in the near corner of the room.

It was an enchanting mixture of colours and scents and the harmony in which they fused together was breathtaking. In the middle, a Long Lily Flower was centering the scene, strong and independent

It was the most revolting thing she ever saw.

The small beads of lights emitting from the bouquet were revolving restlessly around the unpicked card, still buried between the petals and thrones. She knew exactly what was written inside, she knew whose scribbling it was and knew who sent the kisses still unreleased by the captivating charm. And it hurt, like a burning metal rod touching every part of her body, touching her heart, setting her nerves and strings on fire. That fire was a fire of need, of desire to run away and hide in the nearest hole, escaping from his loving gaze and unbearably attentive attitude.

She hated him. She wanted him out of her life right now.

Her eyes were focused on the bouquet again and the need to turn these gaudy petals into ashes of dust and regret and pain was intensifying. The lava shot across her veins, leaking into her heart, her brain, her fingers which twisted persistently holding back the anger...

KNOCK KNOCK

Taking in a deep breath, she sat up and moved to the door. Leaning one ear softly on the door, she asked.

"Who?"

"It's me, Lils"

It's you, aka, the last person I wanted to see now.

Her hands hugged the door knob and with a light twist, it opened revealing a handsome young man with a silky black hair and two stones of cold grey eyes.

"Hey." He said, and she could see the stones cracking under her enchantment, the boiling beneath the rocks starting to emit steam through.

"Hey," she returned the smile with a tight-lipped one.

"Got my flowers?" The way his eyes were fixed on her, like a goddess, the centre of the universe. The intensity in which he looked at her set alarms in her mind. They weren't alarms of danger, but rather of the electrified small gap between them, filled with charges which only emitted from his side.

Why can't she just fall in love with him? Why?

"Yeaah," she titled her head to where the flowers were resting. It took Lily time to comprehend that it was still her turn in the conversation, that she was supposed to say something all witty and loving, "they are beautiful. You shouldn't have really bothered."

His eyes noticed the card, still closed tightly the way it was.

"You know how much I care about you." He gaze shifted towards her, his smile slipping slightly, his friendly attitude sliding away. The intensity with which he looked at her, of the way his eyes pleaded for her to understand, to keep him ...

"And I do care much about you too." Her smile stretched, sincerer, truer, happier... satisfied.

"Well, I was just checking you got my present. I'll get going now." He took a step backwards, his hand brushing the back of his neck, "see you at lunch?"

He was stalling, his legs disobeying his orders to move, to stay away from her.

"Of course." And she swiftly stepped forward, stood on her tiptoes and planted a soft peek on his cheek, close to the corner of his mouth.

And how could she tell him to go away when he gave her love? When he filled her with the attention she needed the most ? The care she craved? She didn't love him, she couldn't get herself to picture herself with him, but his presence was like a drug. No, not his presence, the way he stared at her, the way he cared for her, the way he made her feel. When she'd think, she wouldn't think of how beautiful his eyes were. Instead, she'd find herself thinking of how they crack open under her orders.

It was ALL about her.

And when she'd get enough, when she had the doze she needed, the mere thought of him would be nauseating, a weight drowning her down into a loveless ocean. Just like the moment she received the bouquet, the moment she felt trapped, the moment she wanted him to burn.

"Merlin! These flowers are beautiful!" Joanne's voice, her roommate, boomed from behind and she hurried towards the flowers, "Lily, they are beautiful! You must be so lucky to find someone who loves you so much! Karl is such a sweetheart." She lowered her head to smell the scent, "and these beads..."

She looked at Lily again, and the true happiness she saw in her eyes were enough to evoke the deeply buried sense of guilt she tried to ignore. How everyone thought she must be in love with him ... that it was only a matter of time before announcing it ...

No, not in a million year would she accept Karl. She would say no, she would say they were just friends, she would say the kiss was close to his lips by mere accident ...

And she didn't care.

The bitch inside of her was fully in charge now, giving excuses for hanging Karl desperately that way; she didn't want to break him, she was showing enough signs that he was only her friend anyway.

The bitch no one knows when and how did she took control, the bitch Lily found herself much more comfortable being her, that bitch would never get attached again, would never give her fullest to someone, would never lay there in the open wind all naked and exposed ... would never put someone's well-being over hers.

That bitch won't break into tiny microscopical pieces which could be carried away by a mere puff when she's in the common room and sees him. That bitch won't feel the shattering of her heart, the devastation in her chest, the excruciating longing when their eyes meet and his lips twitch into a skeptical smirk.

That bitch James Potter created.

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**Shall I work on that one and complete the story? I know how they ended up there but I am not sure whether it's worth it or not. **

**Review please :) **


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